Guest Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 My daughter (13yrs) is booked (and paid for) to go skiing with the school in March and The German Trip in May. She had sorted out what (so called) friends she wanted to go with. Now they have all dumped her and agreed to go with others because they don't want to hurt the other girls feelings (what about my daughters!). She has come home from school today crying and saying its no point going on any of the trips. I have tried to reassure her that there will be someone to go with and that it will all change again in the next few months. It breaks my heart to think that she may be away from home with no one wanting to be with her. (she has been away on school trips before). I know really that she will enjoy herself once she gets there and that girls are so bitchy - but why do we have to be like that. She has to choose in the next few weeks who she wants to share rooms with and give them to teachers, so I'm hoping that she will be sorted by then and they will all be friends again if not I don't fancy the upset when she gets home that night!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnonyMouse_8623 Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 This happened with my daughter last year when she was 13 and just before her ski trip! The end of the world was nigh and she didn't want to go. Lots of tears from her and I just wanted to bang their heads together. As a parent you just can't help getting angry seeing the devestation it causes. I found it very hard to welcome these 'so-called friends' back into my house again - gritted teeth come to mind!!!! A week before the trip..............best friends again!! Off she went and had the best time of her life. No falling out with anyone and came back still smiling. What is it about girls? I have two and no experience with boys. Are they like this too? If I had a pound for every time I've heard ................. I'm not your friend! We don't want to hang out with you! It must be very hard to see your daughter like this but I'm sure things will be different next week. At this stage it is better to let them sort it out themselves and they usually do. Let us know the outcome won't you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 Can I just add that I know what it is like!! that happened to me when I was at school, with one particular girl, we made friends again etc etc but things happened throughout the years. A few months ago I got fed up of always being the one to compromise and finally realsied I did not wnat people like that in my life (it remonded me of being at school... still! ) People like that you don't need as friends and your daughter will realise that in time, it just may take a while!! until then all you can do is support her as much as you can and give her the confidence to make new/other friends who are worthy of that title!! Hope it all works out ok x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnonyMouse_705 Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 My 12 year old daughter seems to have so many more problems that both my older boys put together or perhaps I just get to hear about them! It's usually about falling out with friends, girls can be so hurtful and sensitive in equal measure. I'm sure they'll soon be the best of friends again soon. If not get new friends! That's what I did at that age, one day decided I couldn't put up with it any more, went and sat with other girls much to the amazement of my so called friends and never went back. Remained friends with them all and reclaimed my self-respect! Hope it all gets sorted soon. My daughter has just got back from 2 nights away with School. Had a great time, haven't heard of any huge dramas as yet but could be because she is so tired from not sleeping very much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wolfie Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 Yep, I have to say boys seem to be far easier than girls in that respect. If boys fall out, it's usually a quick punch on the nose, a breather from each other and move on. With girls, it goes on for weeks...and weeks....and weeks....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 Oh how I sympathise! My daughter had the same situation last summer, just weeks before her first "solo" foreign trip. She was distraught (and so was I!) I suggested she spoke to one friend and told her how she was feeling. It turned out the other girl was apprehensive too and wondering if the other "friends" would turn against her before the trip. They made a pact to stick together - on the journey, sharing a room etc. They even spoke to the teacher leading the trip and told her what they had decided and why! she was really impressed and supportive of them. The girls stuck by each other and had a great time - no quarrels or falling out and chose to keep their distance from the others because they kept arguing and they were sick of getting caught in the middle of the tears and tantrums. The teachers commented on their mature attitude on their return and told us they were a joy to have along. They are still great friends and use the same tactic for all trips (even theatre visits) now. Good Luck, hope she gets it sorted. I'm sure she'll have a fab time and you'll be the one nail biting for the length of the trip! Nona Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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