AnonyMouse_3307 Posted October 17, 2004 Posted October 17, 2004 WOW...That's spooky. In a previous school (big old Victorian job) we had footsteps on the stairs when noone was around but I never heard them. Others had though. It was also often a lot colder in one sector than the rest of the place. On the original theme, I was signed off work 2 years ago with the highest blood pressure known to mankind, stressed out of my head and so depressed that in the end I was on anti-depessants. After 7 months I went back to work and through the support of a wonderful psychologist worked on a radical change of perspective. I tried to stop living to work and worked hard on working to live instead. Planning was limited to a set time at weekends, mostly Sunday am listening to radio 4 and not past 12o'clock. I stayed at school until 6 most nights to do meetings and class stuff and therefore tried not to cart useless guilt making things that I wouldn't touch anyway home with me. I prioritised more and tried not to get overwhelmed with guilt at not doing everything right now and perfectly to boot. It wasn't easy but it did help keep me sane. Life is too short and sometimes it takes a bit of a shock to make you wake up to that . So Leo, I salute you and wish you all the best in whatever you choose to do next. Cxx Quote
AnonyMouse_79 Posted October 17, 2004 Posted October 17, 2004 Thats a reassuring story Catma, I know youre in a new job now so do take care! I'll take heart that the light at the end of my tunnel neednt be too dim, even if its not over bright at the moment!!! Quote
AnonyMouse_64 Posted October 17, 2004 Posted October 17, 2004 Thanks for sharing that with us Catma. Sometimes we all need reminding about what is important in our lives but it's often difficult to get the right perspective. I know I tend to get obsessive about my work and my family life will suffer as a result. I'm sure there are many of us like this out there. Sometimes it's good to take stock and decide how many hours we are actually prepared to put in and then stick to it. Well done to you for having found a good balance which is working for you at the moment. Quote
Guest Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 Dear catma thank you for your message of reassurance. I hope that things will imporve for me as well. I think things went downhill when took stock of the amount of time and money i was spending on my nursery. Other staff however only see that you leave in the afternoon and forget that you subsequently earn 1/2 of what they do. I found mysef remindeng them and then i thought 'why should I justify to others? Susan- you and i will have to just wait for the sliver lining in the cloud!!! Quote
AnonyMouse_3307 Posted October 18, 2004 Posted October 18, 2004 Susan you're right, I did get a different kind of job and I'm really happy now doing something in education that actually makes me feel like I'm making some kind of a difference. One of the things I did was to take stock of what I really wanted to do and then what I needed to get on my CV to help me get it. a year and 2 interviews later i did get my current post and the sky is blue again. As my mum used to say: There are no medals for martyrs!!! Quote
Guest Posted October 19, 2004 Posted October 19, 2004 I've done I've resigned and feel so much better. No mre getting stressed out. No more wodering how to get everything done. now more going to school on sat and sun Quote
AnonyMouse_1027 Posted October 19, 2004 Posted October 19, 2004 well done Leo, there will be somthing bright, new and exiting around the corner Quote
AnonyMouse_64 Posted October 19, 2004 Posted October 19, 2004 Glad you're feeling so positive about your change of direction Leo. Good luck for the future. Quote
AnonyMouse_2732 Posted October 19, 2004 Posted October 19, 2004 And that's a great big ditto here! Sue Quote
AnonyMouse_3139 Posted October 19, 2004 Posted October 19, 2004 Well done Leo, if you're feeling better now then you really do know it was the right decision. I only wish I could be so brave and certain. Have fun deciding what to do next Quote
Guest Posted October 19, 2004 Posted October 19, 2004 yes i keep thinking about plannning fo rnext term only to realise i won't be there. But i feel i have been pushed out of the job that i loved bec school was not able to recog nursery as being part of the founaton statin. The rec/yr 1 class has been made into a pure rec class just bec we were going to be ofsted and shehas 11 children in her calss. Next yeat there will be 3 chidlren form rec going into rec and i wonder what will ahppen then. I'm surpirsed that my school does not do any forward planning. Surely If i know therew will be 3/5 chikdren next year, school should be able to plan in the smae information availble.But then agin , is it my problem?!!!!!! Quote
Guest Posted October 20, 2004 Posted October 20, 2004 Head came in to watch me'teach'. During debriefing wanted to know how come i was not assessing chidlren's learning in ther own initated play. Explained that we do it informally allthe time- explained that we make observations that feed into assesments- write postit notes, photographs etc and sometimes things do not have to be all writted down in evidence but we assess by the answers to we get to our questions and by our own responses to the chidlren- differentiation by actiivty, outcomes etc etc. He then wanted to know why chidlren were not being taught to persevere in their chidl initated play- said he observed a couple who palyed wqith the trains, went to read books and went into the role-play- unlike the little girl who sat for 15 mins at the computer. Had to explain to him that litle chidlren have short attention span, move on from activity bec they like to try out differnt things and the'little girl' had been with us for almost 11/2 years and was ready to go into reception in jan and was exactly like the 3 year olds when she joined nursery last year. and with expereicne and time chidlren begint to play for longer pereiods of time. Also explained that as i was moving around all the ares of the nursery it was impossible for me to 'make chidlren ' do their child iniitated play for 15 mins. And the weather did not help-all this rain!!! Do you think my explanations were correct? did i say the right thing? Please advice Yours confused Leo Quote
Guest Posted October 20, 2004 Posted October 20, 2004 Funny isn't it how things that we are worrying or contemplating doing are being thought of by others too (if you see what I mean??????) I'm now actually thinking of resigning with no job to go to because I'm so miserable and can't get another job. But what to do about money????? Perhaps there is someone out there who can give me a job?????????????? Kate Quote
AnonyMouse_3139 Posted October 20, 2004 Posted October 20, 2004 Me too Kate, have been for about 12 months, but like you say, 'What to do about money'. On the bright side though...we are all badly paid so you wont be giving up much Quote
Guest Posted October 20, 2004 Posted October 20, 2004 come on Kate and rea, You need to do what you think is best for you. i put up with my job inspite of problems bec i thought it would get better. I work 30 miles away from home so didin't mind travelling 2 hours for a job that lasted 3 hours- only bec i enjoyed doing it. But when it took over everything else I thought 'enough was enough' I will work with chidlren but will try something different. But like you say- it's easier if yu don't have to depend on your salary.to make ends meet. best of lcuk remember you are the most important person in your life Quote
AnonyMouse_79 Posted October 20, 2004 Posted October 20, 2004 Leo, have the courage of your own convictions! Kate, so sorry to hear things are still so rough. I understand about all your reservations about leaving without something else lined up but if you are that unhappy you may never do yourself justice in an interview. Do look after yourself! Quote
AnonyMouse_3139 Posted October 20, 2004 Posted October 20, 2004 Kate, are you hanging on because of loyalty? I think thats what I'm doing, I work with lovely lovely people and I know none of them would like my role, so I'm kinda hanging on, see what happens with the proposed sharing of premises with the primary next door, wait till everyone's settled. (I feel like a mother hen, but I'd hate myself for leaving them in the lurch...or do I think too much of myself?) It's a hard one, but I believe in waiting it out, Julie Andrews in the Sound of music said ' when god closes a door somewhere he opens a window'. I think I'll just wait till the doors shut. Quote
Guest Posted October 20, 2004 Posted October 20, 2004 rea Hi , it's comforting to hear of people in the same boat, but no I'm not hanging on because of loyalty, but because of money. Susan thanks for your kind words...It does help. You're all such a caring lot. Kate Quote
Guest Posted October 21, 2004 Posted October 21, 2004 Rea- read you message. I too thought that the unit wouldnot cope wihtout me- but i think that was my ego which made me think i was indespensible. but i'm not and life does go on and we have to live for ourselves. I'm becoming very philosophical now that i'm leaving. Sme people see loyalty as a weakness and will exploit it. Be loyal to yourself Quote
AnonyMouse_3307 Posted October 22, 2004 Posted October 22, 2004 Leo, re your observation. You are not wrong, but you sound so demoralised that you don't know if you are able to "do it right" any more. I can remember the day when I was so depressed and the early years advisor came to see me. I just fell apart. How I didn't just stop in the middle of the room and wail I don't know. And I knew that I was the person who used to enjoy inspectors coming to see what I was doing!! I couldn't understand why it all felt so bad. That confusion is the result of the situation you find yourself in. Hang on to what you know is right......you will find people who trust your expertise and knowledge somewhere. Quote
Guest Posted October 22, 2004 Posted October 22, 2004 just want to send a hug to kate ,rea and leo . it can be quite soul destroying when you don`t feel appreciated within the work place . luckily it has only happened once to me and along time ago .my only regret i have still , is that i didn`t tell her to stick it where the sun don`t shine! not that i think you should do that,but you should believe in yourselves and put yourselves first. chins up! maddy. Quote
AnonyMouse_3139 Posted October 22, 2004 Posted October 22, 2004 Maddy I did that once, many years ago while on a tempoary job totally unrelated to childcare. I felt brilliant afterwards, if a little ashamed that I'd gone that low, the look on her face was priceless. (not that I'm recommending anybody does it) I havent got anybody to aim it at now though, it's just the job in general I think. Thanks for the hug Quote
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