AnonyMouse_19135 Posted January 31, 2009 Posted January 31, 2009 Unfortunately we have had 2 seperate incidents of children hitting and pinching 2 members of staff, they were on totally different days and neither child witnessed the other one doing it. The first one was because at story time boy "A" was told he couldn't sit next to a certain other child because they had both been extremely "challenging" all session. "A" was not at all impressed in not getting his own way so he kicked the chair over, staff member spoke to him calmly and said that behaviour was not allowed at pre school and asked him nicely to pick up the chair again so we could all sit for a nice story, child A then started shouting through gritted teeth and kept saying "you're making me angry go away" his hands were curling up into little "claws" and he went to the staff member, she said to calm down and lets have a story, he said no then hit her. Another staff member came in to the circle and took child A away so the story could start and explained to him how sad the other staff member was because he had hit her and asked why he was angry etc and explained why it was wrong to hit, he wasn't having any of it and grabbed the skin on her neck and pinched it At this point rightly or wrongly I rang mum to come and get him, I sat him at a table with some paper and asked him to draw a picture for the staff members to say sorry, again explining to him why it is wrong to hit/pinch others and tried to ask why he was so angry, at which point he curled his hands up into claws again and got them about an inch from my face and again said "you're making me angry" through gritted teeth. I didn't want to back off so I calmly said that if he touched my face with his hands then I would have to talk to mummy about whether he could come back tomorrow - not sure if that was right or not really Anyway, another day this week child "B" hit out at a member of staff because she didn't want to sit down - we don't generally make the children sit down for any length of time but we do when it is home time as they sit in a circle and we call them one by one - for their safety. So, after all that babbling, I wonder if anyone has an example of a violence against staff policy please? I do mention it very briefly in our behaviour policy but I do think we need a seperate one too.... The second policy I need help with is children wearing jewellery, we've had two 2 year olds start over the last few weeks, one wears quite large hoop earings and the other wears a necklace with cross on. I spoke to dad with regard the earings I said that another child had shown a big interest in them and I was worried that she may have them pulled out and I didn't want them hurting her ears etc, I asked if it was possible that she just wears studs - dad was absolutely fine. The child wearing a necklace was dealt with by another member of staff and the mum got a bit funny saying her previous nursery had never worried about it. I would rather have something in writing but sensitively to explain if jewellery is worn for religious reasons etc then to discuss it with me but i'm not good at writing that sort of thing lol Can anyone help please? Thank you in advance
AnonyMouse_13453 Posted January 31, 2009 Posted January 31, 2009 Here's our behaviour management, I'll look for the other Behaviour_Management_Policy.doc
AnonyMouse_13453 Posted January 31, 2009 Posted January 31, 2009 Can't find the other - although I know it's somewhere - in our Prospectus I think. Says something like "We ask that children do not wear jewellery which could cause them injury if pulled by another child. Earrings or necklaces could be pulled or lost when a child is dressing up, or pulled by an inquisitive child. Jewellery can either be given into you child's Key Person's safe keeping, or taken off or you can take it back home when you drop your child off. If your child must wear these items for religious reasons, please have a word with Cait and we'll plan for your child's safety." Something along those lines anyway
AnonyMouse_13453 Posted January 31, 2009 Posted January 31, 2009 Hmm - reading that back it says "pulled" rather a lot! Might amend the original to emphasise the pulling aspect!
Guest Posted January 31, 2009 Posted January 31, 2009 I've got one about jewellery but its at work, I'll try to remember to post it on monday, its more a disclaimer than a policy as alot of children have to wear jewellery because of their religion
AnonyMouse_6008 Posted February 1, 2009 Posted February 1, 2009 I've got no advice on either policy as they're all at work and don't specifically cover what you want. (Our jewellery policy looks more at us resepcting religious jewellery.) But did you record the incidents in your incident book & get the collecting adults to sign it? (We have a little boy on a behaviour policy and he is getting better... but last week he bit someone. It was home time, we said 'go and get your coats', an adult, pregnant student went to help him find his coat as she knows he needs help focussing on what he's going to do. And he bit her arm. Sigh. Mum's suggestion has been to tell him we'll hit him if he's naughty!
Guest Posted February 1, 2009 Posted February 1, 2009 I must admit what struck me was how well boy A could voice and describe his feelings, either he understood fully what he was saying or he was role modelling maybe what he's heard elsewhere. Rather than trying to make him sit down with the group, a no win situation for him whilst clearly in an angry state, I would have got a member of staff to say, "I can see that you are angry, you need to come over here and be with me for a while whilst we calm down" I would then state firmly why all the children need to sit together, state firmly why I had decided he couldn't sit near his friend, then I would say to him, hitting is wrong, I think you know that, right I need you to sit with the others, how do you think you can do that and not feel angry, or do you feel you still need to sit here with me for a while and miss the story, whilst you calm down. If he decides to sit with the others I would praise him for calming down and choosing to sit with the others nicely (as he moves towards the group). If he says he's still angry I'd say he needs to stay where he is until he is calm, I'd ask him to tell me when he feels calm and then sit by him but not speak or interact with him. When he says he's calm I would then decide whether to discuss the hitting at this time, possibly not, I'd want to maintain the calm and get him back with the group (the original intention which caused the flare u) I would most probably address the hitting behaviour at a later time, I think this is a learnt behaviour which will take time to change. Some puppet play or other feelings type and appropriatte behaviour when angry type activities would help. Actually reading back at your post I would have removed him when he kicked the chair over. By asking him to pick it up it caused a 'battle of wills' (so, so easy to get into so please don't feel I'm judging the staffs reaction). I didn't have a jewellery policy when I had a preschool, I dealt with any issues on an individual basis, a bit like what you did with the father of the child with large earings. If I did write one it would include consideration to safety (maybe do a risk assessment to be clear of safety issues and not have subjective thoughts on what is safe or not), consideration of religious practice. I would have a disclaimer for children wearing jewellery for religious reasons. When I ran my preschool if a child was wearing jewellery which I thought posed a health risk I would remove it, basically because a disclaimer re: injury doesn't stop a childs pain (or split ear for example) so I would act on behalf of the child and tell parents why I removed it, handing the jewellery and the uninjured child safely back to them at the end of the day. Peggy Peggy
AnonyMouse_19135 Posted February 1, 2009 Author Posted February 1, 2009 Thank you for all the advice Unfortunately, 2 particular members of staff are very what I would describe as "old school" they believe children should do as they are told when they are told etc - which in a way is right but then it's not showing their individuality oohh tough one, i'm worried if we take one child out from the group the others will want to follow
Guest Posted February 1, 2009 Posted February 1, 2009 If story time is stimulating and exciting I'm sure the other children won't want to leave the group and miss it. Mrs bat, I think you've hit the nail on the head re: 'old school' staff, it's how to manage adult led full group activities within the ethos of the EYFS as meeting the needs of the individual. Good luck. Peggy
AnonyMouse_12805 Posted February 2, 2009 Posted February 2, 2009 Behaviour is difficult to advise on as each case is so different, also I think Peggy has probably said it all really (and very well I may add!!) As for jewellary- we dont have a policy on this, I think we may have something within our H&S one, the religous bit doesn't come into it with us as we are a RC group anyway. I cant think of any religion that includes wearing large earrings, but could be wrong. We do state in our prospectus and I often put out reminders in newsletters about not waering it. We had a child lst week wearing hoops, tried to contact Mum, for permission to remove couldn't get hold of her, so I made the decision to remove them. We had balls, beanbags and basketball net out that day and I was very concerned about a finger catching inside one. Mum was fine when she came to collect, had just forgotten they were in. I'm not sure I would do a policy on jelwellary, to be honest it's never occurred to me as we have always treated each case individually.
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