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Should I Go To The Party ?


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Hi All - have a little question - a little boy from Asia has just started at pre-school - I have met his family during a home visit and he is beginning to settle into pre-school well - this week he gave me an invitation to his party which will be at his house. My first thoughts were, I will say thank you, but make up an excuse not to go, generally in little old England we are not invited to parties and maybe we all try not be become too familiar, however, I have been thinking about this a bit more, I feel really pleased that his family have asked me to come, as they see me important within their life - so should I go or not - other staff who have been asked feel we should not go............................ any views appreciated. Dot

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If I was 'available' I think I would, but then again I always went against the grain so to speak, balancing 'professional' expectations and 'familiarity' my position as owner of a preschool enabled me to have. So, I'm not saying it's necessarily professional etiquette. I still attend the birthday party of a child who went to my preschool (which closed in Dec 07).

I suppose it depends on you as an individual if you are the owner of your setting, but if an employee would need to ok it with the boss.

 

In my experience, I have found Asian families to be very 'social', and by accepting their invitations and their customary practice of always offering food to visitors, I have learnt just that bit more about their way of life, all the more enriching for me, I've felt.

 

Peggy

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How lovely of them to invite you. My personal feeling is that you should go if you wish. I believe that this is probably just a cultural difference but sometimes its really good to embrace that. I have attended weddings of members of families that I have taught, not even knowing bride or groom sometimes and have really enjoyed the occasions - just because it is the norm within their culture (this was Bengali) to invite the wider community. I have also been invited to tea and when new babies have been born. I have always taken a gift and usually kept the visit quite short. I totally understand that some of your colleagues might not want to go and thats fine, for some it might be as simple as not wanting to give up their own family time at weekend. I would just say that you are going to stop by for a short time and I bet you find you wont be the only one. Obviously thats just my opinion and I think you should do what you are most comfotable with, I guess I just like the whole community type thing. Zoe.

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I guess it's about being fair too isn't it. My little boy was very upset when his teacher went to one of the other childrens parties but didn't come to his, even though his was a footie party & the teacher was an avid man utd fan.

 

I've been to parties of children once they've left the setting but that's been more to do with when i was available than anything else, and my friendships with their parents. Does that make sense?

 

Sam

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we had this happen to us a while ago, a Brazilian family, she invited all at pre-school, those who could went , it is not usual but as a pre-school we felt it was acceptable if we wanted to..

 

we have also been invited and attended other occasions.. sometimes stressful, (funeral of a younger sibling of child attending) but parent felt the need for our support so we all went.

 

 

Inge

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When my son was at preschool he was invited to lots of parties and I would attend with him, when he left I was invited to a party at one of the children's houses, I went and had a great time!! Although I did get my big bottom stuck in the inflatable ring in the middle of the bouncy castle!! xD I didn't here the end of it at preschool the next week!! :o

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This family have chosen to include you in an important family occasion, and as you say we don't usually get invited along to these kind of events. I think I would probably go if I was available, but on the understanding that this would probably mean accepting any other such invitations in the future. I like to think I'm an 'equal opportunities' party goer! :o

 

Maz

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Hi All

 

love this :

I like to think I'm an 'equal opportunities' party goer!

 

It is so great to ask questions for advice on here and get such great replies - I think I just needed to know what everyone else thought and I certainly will be going along even if for a short while - and of couse attending any other parties I may get invited to - I do feel really pleased that I was asked.

 

Thanks again :o Dot

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Hi Dot

 

I think you should go! We have friends who are from a different part of the world and it has been eye opening to be invited to their home and see how different their culture is. We were also priveledged to get an invite to their house, when her mother was visiting. Her mother did not speak english, but could not have made us feel more welcome and it was a delight to meet such an open, warm and genuine family and to be made to feel a part of it.

 

It has given me a better understanding of their culture and only today I learnt more about their culture and the values they have. They have made an offer of help to us that would not happen in our culture. My friend was acared of offending me when she made this offer and explained that this is how they help friends in their country, but even before she started to explain, I understood why the offer was made as I now have a good understanding with their culture.

 

Although I declined the offer, it meant a lot. Once again my friend has continued to amaze me.

 

Sorry if I waffle, but I can't quite put into words the envy I have for the harmony and kindness that is part of their culture. Something we should see more of in ours.

 

Obviously I do see a lot of kindness and harmony on the forum, its what keeps me coming back for more! :o

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I was invited to a party a few years ago - but found out when I got there that it was so I could supervise the children in the soft play area so the mums could have a right old natter in the coffee shop! Flippin cheek! Needless to say I wasn't best amused. I didn't even get a cup of tea

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I was invited to a party a few years ago - but found out when I got there that it was so I could supervise the children in the soft play area so the mums could have a right old natter in the coffee shop! Flippin cheek! Needless to say I wasn't best amused. I didn't even get a cup of tea

You should have billed them Cait!

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