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Shocked And Upset.


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I moved jobs in January and I had a very distressing call from the NN at my last school this evening. A little girl that was in my class died last week from meningitis :o Apart from the disbelief and shock I have absolutely cried my eyes out. She was such a beautiful little girl, so shy and timid. I watched her confidence begin to emerge during my term at the school, and I just feel so depressed and totally drained. I am an NQT and this is the first time anything like this has happened to me...I hope that it is not something we have to deal with on a regular basis, I don't think I can stand the pain.

I wish I could ease her family's pain. She never had the chance to shine to her full potential but I hope she rests in peace. xxx

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Tracy

This must be such a difficult thing for you to deal with. Death is hard but especially so when it is a child. Take heart that it will not happen often-I have never had to deal with the death of a child but have done so for three parents. And I have owned my pre-school for 15 years.

Thinking of you

Linda

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I had similar news yesterday, a baby 18 months old that I know very well died in his sleep with no warning at all. If I feel this bad, how on earth are the parents feeling? :o

 

I empathise and send you a huge hug.

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thinking of you both

 

what a feeling to have to go through, especially when its a child.

 

We watch them grow and move on but never forget them.

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I do empathise. It must be particularly hard so early in your career. In my 15 years, I can think of 1 parent and 1 ex-colleague who have died, as well as a 3 year old as a result of an awful accident - not with us, I hasten to add. It was a dreadful time but almost 2 years on we've also been able to rejoice with the family over the birth of their new child. I think everyone is right - it won't happen often. The shock seems fairly short-lived, but the pain never goes away totally - just gets pushed more to the background perhaps. I hope your happy memories of this little girl will help you in times to come.

 

Thinking about you.

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I am so sorry. You must be devastated. As others have said, this is very rare, so do not imagine that you will face this sort of situation over and over during your career. I have dealt with one parent and one colleague's death, but never a child.

 

My thoughts are with you and the little girl's family.

 

Nicola

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Hi Tracey and Kate, how very very awful for you both. Words are inadequate.

Tracey, do contact the family if you feel at all able. I am sure they will take comfort at your words of remembrance and it will help you to feel a little less helpless. Dont be embarrassed by your tears either, they show you care and I am sure the children in your care are going to appreciate that.

 

I have never had to deal with this particular blow although other situations have been equally painful. Fortunately they are few and far between.

 

Take care of yourselves too.

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Hi Tracey and Kate, how very very awful for you both. Words are inadequate.

Tracey, do contact the family if you feel at all able. I am sure they will take comfort at your words of remembrance and it will help you to feel a little less helpless. Dont be embarrassed by your tears either, they show you care and I am sure the children in your care are going to appreciate that.

 

I have never had to deal with this particular blow although other situations have been equally painful. Fortunately they are few and far between.

 

Take care of yourselves too.

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Hi Tracy. i have been teaching for nearly four years, but in my second year of teaching, we had the horrible news that one of the boys who had been in my class the previous year had died in a house fire overnight. His mum also died.

I felt I wanted to go to the funeral, and because he had still been at school, his then classteacher and the head accompanied me.

It was very harrowing, I dont think much could be worse than going to a child's funeral, but it also helped me to deal with the grief that I was feeling.

 

If you think it is appropriate and you want to, then I would say go to the funeral, but be prepared, It is very hard, but it may help you to deal with the grief too.

 

I know how you are feeling, and my thoughts are with you.

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I moved jobs in January and I had a very distressing call from the NN at my last school this evening. A little girl that was in my class died last week from meningitis  :o  Apart from the disbelief and shock I have absolutely cried my eyes out. She was such a beautiful little girl, so shy and timid. I watched her confidence begin to emerge during my term at the school, and I just feel so depressed and totally drained. I am an NQT and this is the first time anything like this has happened to me...I hope that it is not something we have to deal with on a regular basis, I don't think I can stand the pain.

I wish I could ease her family's pain. She never had the chance to shine to her full potential but  I hope she rests in peace. xxx

27350[/snapback]

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Tracy please contact the family they will be grateful that you will be able to provide them with your memories of their child whilst they were with you. I am a childminder I lost one of my childminded children to cancer aged just fifteen months. He had come to me at 6weeks old, I had minded is brother before him so have a good relatiionship with his family. I can not describe how this affected myself and my family I would hate to think how is own family coped.( They often tried to hide that they was OK but knew they could confide in me) The family are now expecting another baby in the summer and have asked me to look after her when she is born, I take this as a great honour and look forward to this time.

Stay strong and seek support if you need it. Jean XXXX

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In my 26 years being involved in a preschool have never had to deal with this.My heart goes out to the family and all who knew this child.

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How awful for both of you to deal with this tragic news.

 

I do agree about contacting the child's family if you can face it. The death of a loved one is devastating, but I do remember the comfort I derived when my mum died and I had lots of letters from people who knew her. I had no idea who they were, but they told me lots of their memories, what a lovely woman she was etc.

 

It obviously wasn't going to bring her back, but it did help knowing that other people shared in my grief.

 

Maz

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Life is so precious and unfair at times - I believe we should all make life count and treasure every moment - no one knows what is around the corner. My thoughts are with you. Two of my Mum's died in the past year, one was pregnant with her second child. It certainly brings home how fragile we all are.

Nikki

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