Guest Posted June 28, 2010 Posted June 28, 2010 Hi, This may not make much sense but I will try to explain! A boy in my class is struggling with friendships at the moment. He is very able all round, and has no problems in the past with social things. His best friend is now so much more confident than when he started school that he is beginning to choose to play with others, rather than just with F. F was, in the past, more than happy to be with J, but if put with others, or J was away, F was equally able to work/play with all the others. Anyway, F is finding it tricky that J now wants to play with others - they do still spend time together, so he hasn't totally deserted F, just that J is socialising more. We (and F's mum) have talked to him about it being ok for J to play with others, and that they will still be friends, and also that he can still play with J, even in the group. Is just that F is finding it difficult to adjust to this (think it is a new experience for him). Wondered if anyone has any suggestions for a story I can read where a friend feels left out by his/her friend playing with others?! Or any other ideas to support F gratefully received! I don't think it has helped that for the last couple of weeks another child has been quite nasty to F (unrelated to everything else) - we are keeping an eye on this and dealing with it, which F knows, but think this is adding to it. Child being nasty has gone on hol for 2 weeks now though so that may make a difference too! Thanks x
AnonyMouse_13453 Posted June 28, 2010 Posted June 28, 2010 Is there anyone else you can pair him with, someone who he can have a bit of fun with without the need for F.? If he starts to make a few side branches he won't be so dependent on just one child. You could scaffold this play for a while, perhaps providing them with resources they wouldn't normally have access to - I've done this successfully in the past. Something else I've done is a buddy day, where each child is paired up with someone they wouldn't normally play with; this enables us to look at how children are socialising generally as well as their social ability. We give them stickers of particular colours, or animals, and they have to find their buddy and stay with them for the session. Little Beaver and the Echo is a story about making friends, and loneliness, Can we play too, Piglittle is another about sharing friendships Sharing a shell is about being friends and sharing i'll keep thinking about the books!
Guest Posted June 28, 2010 Posted June 28, 2010 Thanks Cait. Is a tricky one (for me anyway!) - he has never seemed in the slightest dependent on J, in fact he was the one who would play with others. It is almosst like now J is more confident in socialising, F is feeling abandined, even though he does have lots of other friends anyway. Thanks for the suggestions though - will definitely give them a try.
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