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Big Fat Gypsy Weddings


AnonyMouse_3735

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ok.. the whole title of this put me off watching it... don't know why but it really did not appeal to me

 

then with browsing through a couple of weeks ago thought I would have a peek

 

and then I was hooked.

 

it is so much more than the weddings side... all the heritage and lifestyle, and while causing some unrest amongst the communities themselves I am finding it fascinating to watch.

 

I have found it like stepping back in time ... and wonder if some of the traditions are really not as bad as they seem.. but still have my doubts..and questions

 

having researched my family tree I do find that actually one of my ancestors was a Romany who settled rather than continue travelling.. so perhaps I have more of an interest than others.

 

To us it may seem extreme and dated, but I must admit some of the traditions I do hold in great respect..

 

anyone else hooked on this ?

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I watched the first two and was totally put off by the way the girls have no ambition outside of cleaning and cooking for their man and how getting married at 16 is such a massive achievment.

I hated how the lads could 'grab' at a girl he wanted to kiss especially at the wedding when the girl who had struggled with the lad looked visibly upset while still maintaining its just how it is.

The whole thing made me uncomfortable.

Edited by Rea
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Yes I am hooked! saw the first one by mistake and have watched ever since.

 

I used to work for my local Traveller Education Service and had my eyes opened,

 

I get cross when people tar them all with the same brush. I have had the pleasure of meeting with and working with some truly lovely, genuine people.

 

Like all culture there are good and bad within I guess but the travelling community particularly seem to get slated wherever they go.

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I watched the first two and was totally put off by the way the girls have no ambition outside of cleaning and cooking for their man and how getting married at 16 is such a massive achievment.

I hated how the lads could 'grab' at a girl he wanted to kiss especially at the wedding when the girl who had struggled with the lad looked visibly upset while still maintaining its just how it is.

The whole thing made me uncomfortable.

 

 

Well, not all traveller women are unambitious, last week showed a young woman who worked with a cake maker creating amazing wedding cakes, and who didn't buy into the idea of only existing to be a wife and mother - although there is nothing wrong with having that as an ambition either.

 

And the grabbing was exagerated for the cameras.

 

I think that it is interesting to look at the norms of other cultures because it makes us reflect on our own. Why is their behaviour any worse than what country people do?

 

And as for their money - in one episode a young couple were shopping for their first caravan, the one they saw was priced at £7000 - I paid more than that for my first year's mortgage/rent, so from year 2 of married life they keep the difference. Imagine how you could live if you were mortgage free.

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Well, not all traveller women are unambitious, last week showed a young woman who worked with a cake maker creating amazing wedding cakes, and who didn't buy into the idea of only existing to be a wife and mother - although there is nothing wrong with having that as an ambition either.

 

And the grabbing was exagerated for the cameras.

 

I think that it is interesting to look at the norms of other cultures because it makes us reflect on our own. Why is their behaviour any worse than what country people do?

 

And as for their money - in one episode a young couple were shopping for their first caravan, the one they saw was priced at £7000 - I paid more than that for my first year's mortgage/rent, so from year 2 of married life they keep the difference. Imagine how you could live if you were mortgage free.

 

I'm quite aware that not all traveller families are like that, I went to school with some and drink with others. I dont think this is the norm either, if the grabbing has been exagerated then what else is. And exagerated or not, the girl looked upset.

I'm interested to know what country people do though!

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I'm quite aware that not all traveller families are like that, I went to school with some and drink with others. I dont think this is the norm either, if the grabbing has been exagerated then what else is. And exagerated or not, the girl looked upset.

I'm interested to know what country people do though!

 

Cheyenne, the young girl who was "grabbed" has given an interview since, saying "not all Travellers know about it, it's more common in their area and it's just boys showing off and it looked so much worse on TV than it actually was"

 

I wonder if perhaps it's our perception of what could happen if this was in our community that makes us feel uncomfortable with it? The Travellers' strict moral code and boundaries makes their young girls feel very secure - enviable in some aspects.

 

I love the series, I watched the C4 Cutting Edge documentary last year and have enjoyed seeing more aspects of their way of life - as has been said it's more than just the wedding dresses (great though they are :o )

 

Nona

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having read the article.. it actually doesn't say much more than has been shown - they have covered a lot of the issues she has already.. and those not I have seen covered in the news/chat programmes.

one comment in the article said no traveller chooses to live in a house...not sure how true this really is, she cannot speak for the whole community.. I have known several who moved into houses or even a flat in one case, out of choice.. but still kept up their beliefs and heritage... so it does happen..

 

It is the snapshot they want us to see into their lives... and some will be exaggerated for the cameras.. but some of the strict moral codes are not what I or many will expect.. to a degree it is like stepping back into time - men the providers women the home makers..

 

I do also wonder where all the income is... some run businesses but need to be anonymous because they will lose customers if their heritage is known.. which is in itself a reflection on the rest of the community, not necessarily the travellers...

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Guest MaryEMac

We have some traveller families in our playgroup and they are of Romany descent. They are saying that they are not really happy because of how travellers are being portrayed. It is not a true picture of their way of life. I haven't watched it myself though.

 

 

Mary

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We have some traveller families in our playgroup and they are of Romany descent. They are saying that they are not really happy because of how travellers are being portrayed. It is not a true picture of their way of life. I haven't watched it myself though.

 

 

Mary

 

 

I would suppose that there are differences in the Romany and the traveller way of life - just like English culture is different to say Welsh or Scottish. So having a mixed background like your families, they probably have a combination of the traditions from both.

 

I think The Romany community is not that impressed with the programme, and feels that travellers and gypsys have been lumped in together when they are two differnt groups with their own cultures and traditions.

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I find the whole series compelling and like others I am hooked.

 

I am however very disturbed watching young girls, as young as 6, made up to look years older, dressed in clothes way beyond their years and dancing and gyrating their hips like experienced lap dancers!

 

This was at an after party celebrating their communion (celebrated early as their camp was due to be demolished)

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I missed it this week and it's not On Demand, so not sure if I'll get to catch up. I've really enjoyed the series, but have watched it knowing that it is a snapshot of a much larger community that doesn't live exactly as portrayed in the episodes.

 

I work in a school where we have large number of traveller families, in fact our school is neighbours with a traveller site and we have fantastic relationships with several of the parent. Some of these parents have voiced their upset at the way travellers were being portrayed, especially with regard to how the girls dress: one of our mums was outraged at the way the children were dressed and said she's never allow her daughter to dress in such a provocative way. This mum actually wanted to contact Channel 4 and asked for help to do so so that she could express her views.

 

I still find it a fascinating insight!

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I am however very disturbed watching young girls, as young as 6, made up to look years older, dressed in clothes way beyond their years and dancing and gyrating their hips like experienced lap dancers!

Yes, I must admit that the apparent inconsistency of the strict moral code within which the girls grow up (as discussed in episode one) and the sight of those little girls heavily made up and wearing very grown up dresses struck me as being very odd. I wondered if it was because of their very safe, almost secluded environment that these young children to experiment with hair, make up and clothes in private? The dancing was very provocative, but not dissimilar to what the six year old fans of Hannah Montanna/Miley Cyrus saw at her concerts last year. :o

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