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I Found A Young Girl Tonight


AnonyMouse_3139

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I was sitting in the car at 9pm tonight waiting for my son to finish work when a young girl in school uniform and clutching a big bag went past me. I tried to watch her in my mirror but couldnt see her so I reversed and saw her sitting in the bus stop crying.

I asked if she was ok and she shook her head, my son arrived just then and asked if she wanted to use the phone. It turns out she'd run away from home, she was 12 years old and had nowhere to go. My son phoned her dad who dosnt live close.

He told the girl to phone the police so we did. They couldnt send anyone out because they were busy and anyway mom had just reported he missing so they'd told her where she was.The girl had told me the police were out to the house yesterday because mom had punched her in the face, that mom often bangs her and her sisters heads together and the=at dad has just come out of a second stint in prison. So, the family mut be known in some way to the police.

Mom arrived with her boyfriend, but she'd barely set foot on the path before the girl was off. I tried to get her to stay, to talk it through, but she ran. Mom asked if she'd said anything but I said no. She got back in the car with the boyfriend, whose face was like thunder, and drove off.

Not 200 yards away, in a garage forecourt, there was 3 police cars and a police van dealing with one vehicle.

Now I have no idea what the incident was, it could have been an attempted robbery, a machette attack, anything, but honestly, there was a 12 year old girl in tears, sitting in a strangers car after 9pm and with nowhere to go.

Priorities would tell me at least one of the police cars could have been dispatched to us.

I'm have to say, I'm not very happy.

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I find it incredible to think that they wouldn't come out to a 12 year old girl, obviously vulnerable, sitting in a car with a complete stranger. She was lucky that you found her Rea, hopefully you've shown her that the world isn't all bad, and that the necessary services rally around this little girl and start to make her life better.

 

I might have said this before. But you are a Very Good Egg.

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I hope I've got people like you in my community.

 

I also think that a call to social services would be a good idea, just to get something recorded somewhere at the very least.

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That's a terrible situation to be put in Rea - well done for not walking by.

 

She has effectively told you about a criminal offence so making sure the police have a formal record of this would be a sensible thing to do as well as provide documentation that might help instigate some action. I wonder if you know any community police locally who might take it more seriously than the call centre people you spoke to yesterday?

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After I got home I called the police to tell them the mother had arrived but that the girl had run off and it was possible there was a young girl out on her own. The woman I spoke to said she had been the one who told mom where her daughter was and she was with a random stranger 'because thats what you are'.

I've decided to go to her school this morning. Social care in Birmingham has let down a few of our youngsters in recent years, enough that I dont have much faith in them following this up. But I am going to go to the girls school. They might be in a better position to monitor things.

We have got a community police station near by, playgroup will have their number.

I had a missed call at midnight, I think from the police so if they call today I will complain about the way it handled, if they dont phone I've already sorted out their contact number.

The more time that goes the more I'm insenced by the police response. As we waited in the car we watched 6 police cars go round the island a short way from us and as we drove home saw 3 at the garage. It really is unbeliveable.

I wish I'd given her the number of childline. We did tell her though that if she runs away again to go to a police station and gave her directions to one.

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Oh Rea, no additional words of advice but a recall an event when my daughter was 17 (yes a lot older, different situation, but nevertheless still left me fuming) and with serious mental health issues, being 'found' by police in London. By the time they got in touch with us, they had let her wander off, on the grounds that 'they did not consider her to be vulnerable'. 16 years old, alone in London, in February with nothing but tshirt and jeans on, no money, no idea how or why she was there, struggling to remember her own name, and without her medication. But apparently not vulnerable! It took us 2 days to find her to bring her home, and you can imagine how distraught we were in that 2 days.

 

It was after this that we said to her, don't ever go to the police when you realize you don't know where you are, go to the hospital, and ask for the duty psychiatrist. Only once in all the occasions this happened (there were a few) did she ever come across a 'Rea' and I still remain very grateful to this lady for not walking on by, and going the extra mile to keep my daughter safe until we could get there.

 

So an opportunity to thank all the 'Reas' out there.

 

I hope all goes well today, at least you cant say you didn't try.

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I guess in their minds the girl was relatively 'safe' and the mother dispatched to the location so they didn't need to bother with it. However, it does sound as if this family would have some sort of history with social services. It just seems to be a case that shows there is no cohesion between all the different agencies and services. :o

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OMG this has really given me the judders especially as I have a 12 year old daughter. I hope you have more luck with the girls school than you have with the police.

 

I have had a recent incident out of work that needed me to call the police on a neighbour ( very bad domestic abuse to both mum and kids ) they were useless. In the end I decided that the next route was the school and they have been supportive but also advised me to contact social care as its a sad state but they say the more calls the more likelyhood of them doing something!!! .

 

Please keep us informed and well done for being so caring x

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I went to the girls school and gave them all the details of last night. I might get a call back from the head of year but if not, at least I know they know and the woman I spoke to could see it was a serious concern.

I went to the police station but it has no desk, just a sign that I ignored saying no vehicles beyond this point. A chap came out and confirmed there is no desk or anyone to speak to. Great.

I phoned our local Safeguarding officer, but she's out of the office for a few weeks and her replacement wasnt available.

I phoned the NSPCC for clarity on the police's response, having had no luck tracking down their child protection procedure. The lady at NSPCC was rather amazed at the police's attitude, especially telling mom where she was without coming out to see what was going on. She suggested I ask the police if they'd refered the matter to social care services, so I have.

I've also let them know I dont think they're response was appropriate and that in my eyes a 12 year old girl crying at a bus stop at 9pm having run away from home is a priority. I wait to see if I get a reply from them.

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Hope you are looking out for yourself in all this rea, you will running on an adrenaline high at the moment so take care.

 

 

Crossed posts there Susan, I'm fine thanks, in fact I'm so darn angry I might even tackle the ironing tonight!

Seriously though, I feel good in a rather pious way. I can remember 3 incidences over the years, where I didnt intervene and they've always stayed with me. The first involved an old man, the second was a young lad at playgroup who was in the care of social services and the third was an old man too.

They are probably the only regrets I have in life, which if you knew me is rather surprising if not fortunate :o

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Rea you have done everything you can for this young girl and if only there were more people in the world like you then it would be a much safer place. I know you as a caring and responsible person. Let's hope someone has listened and something is done for this young girl and her family.

I worry about the response of the Police as it suggests to me that either this type of incident is commonplace and not therefore worthy of an instant action, or they were overstretched. My own experience is that damage to property seems to take priority over possible damage to people. I hope I am wrong and you got the wrong contact on the wrong day.

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This infuriates me. The government always reacts to child protection issues by implying that increasing expensive checks on people who work in childcare will somehow keep them safe. Maybe they should try getting their basic services in order first!

 

Well done though for doing something about it. If everyone did perhaps their wouldn't be so many children leading such heart-breakingly sad lives.

Edited by Guest
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Do we never learn from past mistakes, what a farce!!

 

What fantastic creative thinking getting in touch with school, wouldn't have thought of that but will keep it in mind.

 

I thought your actions were commendable, particularly in this day and age. I remember coming across a little one who'd wandered off. It was at the beginning of the safeguarding over protectiveness where nobody helps incase they are accused of something. Sadly, for this child it seems things have gone too far the other way!!

 

I hope you get to find out what happened to her though knowing what she told you, 'home safe' may not the happy ending But having met you she now knows someone cares

 

bless you Rea, I hope we all have an ounce of your strength and perseverence if we ever find ourselves on a similar situation

 

(Let sleeping ironing lie, I say!)

Edited by gingerbreadman
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So sad to think how vulnerable our young people are ,I think Rea and Mundia have both given us a lot to think about in terms of our collective responsibility for our neighbours -Thank you although it makes me so sad that our "systems" so clearly do not cope with the needs of our children. x

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Well done and bless you, Rea - but then, I'm lucky enough to know you and realise this was BOUND to be your response xxxxx

 

Thanks Sue :o

 

Your post made me think though. Is it bound to be my response?

Blinkin' 'eck, yes it is. I always though I was such a calm, tolerant, non-judgemental person too.

Ooo, I have done some things!!!

I just might be the next Mrs Bucket, oh help! xD

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I was talking about this with a friend who had cause to call the police about an incident within the last year or so. She expressed surprise at the number of police cars who turned up to attend and was told by a PC that they always send at least two cars to incidents because these days they tend to travel alone and so need the security a back up car and officer can offer. That might explain why three cars were attending the garage incident, but it still doesn't explain why they wouldn't go to a vulnerable child in need. :o

 

I can't help wondering what sort of weekend this little girl can look forward to.

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Thank goodness there are people like you in the world Rea.

 

This story makes me think of a time a couple of years ago (totally different situation but featuring a hero like you) when my son got mugged on his way home from school. He was 13. Three older teenagers jumped him, pushed him to the floor and took his mobile phone so he was unable to phone me. A shop owner came out to help him. He let him use his phone to phone me and took him in the shop to wait for me. I found out the next day (when we went back to the shop with a thank you card for him) that he also got in his van and went round the streets looking for the yobs. In a horrible situation, it really helped to know that there are people who are willing to help a stranger in need and that when I wasn't there to protect my baby there was someone willing to step in and do his bit.

It's a shame that we often hear more about the horrid people in the world rather than the lovely ones but I suppose it's part of the nature that these heroes usually don't want or expect any reward for their actions.

 

Thank you Rea for being an inspiration to us all xxx

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Me too Max, so far I've stopped myself from driving down her road and 'casing the joint'. My car is bright red so I just mght be noticed. :o

 

I'm trusting to the school to check things out. Fingers crossed they do because I still havent had a response from the police and I didnt get chance to try SS today.

 

I want to thank everyone, all of you, for your lovely comments. It does make me feel a tad embaressed though. xD

 

Thanks

Edited by Rea
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