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What would you say?


AnonyMouse_26037

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This is not a worry question as such - hence me putting it in the Lounge. I'm just intrigued as to what others would/have said.

 

Yesterday (and I can't remember why) I used the phrase "My mummy..."

 

It was met with "You don't have a mummy!" and when I said "Yes I do!" the response was "No you don't, teachers don't have mummies!"

 

I've quite often had the 'you don't have a mummy' comment before - my mum sometimes comes in to help and last year when she was in we didn't announce her name. One little boy asked her and then ran to me with an incredulous "Miss D! It's Mrs D!" he thought it was hilariously funny that we had the same name.

 

However, I've never had it quite so universally before - usually someone argues with them and points out that teachers do have mummies they're just old! I can't remember how I responded - I think I was a bit flabbergasted - they were so adamant I started to doubt whether I really had a mummy or not. So what would you have said?!

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We make keyring photo cards for the children. They have a photo of themselves, their mum/dad/ brothers and/or sisters, even their pets and a photo of their keyworker. This helps the to form relationships with others and provides them with a comfort if they are upset. Like the children I a have a keyring photo 'album' too and when the conversation comes up of mummies I can show them mine :1b

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:P :P this is one of those things that comes up often along with the you live here (even when i point out there are no beds and no upstairs so where do i sleep!!) we also have an added complication in that my daughter works at preschool too! now that really causes some issues :oxD i sometimes take photos in to show them but it's always a good discussion...!
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hard to say how I would have responded, but would definitely have said I had a mummy, and maybe follow up with a few pictures or topic around mums and grandmothers

 

 

I often had the other issue, When my son used to come in to help or visit me .. who is he... this 6ft 3 man could not be my little boy, I could not be his mum! but they did love it when he came to play for a while..

 

and then there is the one who always peaked in the cupboard and looked for a bed... expecting me to sleep in there.

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Yep, I've had that too, it usually ends up like a 'oh no you dont', 'oh yes I do' pantomime sketch.

It can happen with lots of things, possessions is a good one, if I say I've got some pink socks it can lead to a fairly upset little girl convinced only she can have pink socks so I cant have any.

 

Funny little things arent they? I was shown a winky today and told 'you've got a bigger one'. xD

Honestly! Where else can you possibly have such conversations? :huh:

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How about the question "where's your mummy" - I have been asked this many times when talking to different children about where their mummies are (work, shopping, home) - My Mum has passed away, and I certainly don't want to get into conversation with a 3/4year old about death ! (I'm an agency worker, so sometimes do not know the child's background).

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This reminds me of a conversation with a little girl I had two weeks ago..she enquired whether I was a girl or not and I said that yes I was a girl, she went off and thought about it for a while, then came back to tell me that i was silly, girls have pierced ears so I can't be a girl! Well, that told me then!...wonder if my fiance knows....

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I have often found that young children struggle with grandparents being mummy's mummy or daddy's mummy etc. they look as if I've gone mad - perhaps I have!

 

As Inge has suggested, maybe investigate families, or do a family tree type thing with the children and get the mums and dads really involved.

 

I had that with my daughter and my mum. When she was about three her Nan, my Mum, mentioned that I was her daughter - my daughter became really upset (REALLY!!) and kept insisting to the point of tears that I was HER mummy, not Nan's daughter!

 

Nice suggestion from Inge, too.

 

Sue

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